Minor blip in my plans....

Around 9 month ago after years of physio & determination, I thought I had finally conquered my disability, getting to full health & be stick free once & for all. Even getting on well with cycling & long rides with no issues after.

Well 3 weeks ago that all went to pot when my knee decided to go on me again after nearly 2 yrs of physio to sort it. It went so much so I was in agony & had to make a visit to the A&E where I eventually came back out on crutches & strong painkillers.

So for the first time in a long time I felt somethings I haven't felt in nearly 2 decades when my leg first went bad, disappointment & despair. It didn't help that the painkillers were making the mind all fuzzy & for the first time since I moved to Essex I wished I was back at Farnham, but not for what you might think. It was the flat I am thinking of, being on ground floor & having a garden is what I am missing at the moment. So I can relax & feel OK with it all as the cats would've had freedom to go in the garden & some where I can recuperate. Now there's nothing wrong with my current flat or it's location. Its the fact its in need of decorating & no garden I can easily get to as I'm on the 1st floor.

After 2 weeks, I finally came off the painkillers & crutches but still using the stick. Seen the GP to get a referral to a specialist as obviously the physio isn't working. And my brain is trying to adjust back to how I was years ago & I'm having issues with this, basically I am getting sick & tired with all this. I just want to get on with how I was doing before the knee went again, I aint as young to re-adjust again like I was 20yrs ago & really need to get this knee sorted.

At the moment I am feeling I wish I never had the damn operation to get me stick free as now going back on them is doing my head in & feel like I've been cruelly teased with a stick free life right now as I am back to how I was almost a decade ago & not know just yet when I be stick free again if at all.

So out of this I do feel I need to focus more on certain things, like everyone else we all have this where we have so many things going around in our heads & sometimes it's too much & need to re-evaluate & decide what is important right now. For me I need to sort my leg, a job & generally get my life back on track. The rest will have to wait or give way to what is more important.

So for now, just watch this space as I dunno how the next few weeks, months or years will pan out. I am hoping to try a short gentle cycle ride in a week or so time to test the waters to see if knee can cope. Then go from there, but most of all try not get stressed as I know that never helps the recovery.

Still on 2 legs...

Its been over 6 months now since I've been walking stick free (excluding the few times I need to when carrying heavy items) & wrote my blog On 2 Legs... Well what can I say since then? Actually a fair bit! lol

To start with I gone & got myself a part time job as a cleaner as part of a return to work scheme & even thos it didnt last 6 months, it was a good building block back into work. The work was light but on my feet & lots of stairs & I mean a Lot! 2 days work a week & on my feet for nearly 8hrs a day. hard work at first but as the weeks went on it did improve.

Then there's the cycling, if you've been following me on Twitter you would know I help at Re-Cycle from time to time. Well they helped me build my own roadie style bike that I built to suit me, as I needed something to keep pushing my boundaries. More on that later...

I did the 30 days of Biking again & again I did the Pedal for the Js sponsored cycle, but this time I went for the 50 miles route. So me & my lil Trekr went & conquered the ride.

 

This was great for me as it showed I'm still improving the leg strength & my own fitness, but it also was getting me ready for something that was going to push my boundaries more than I was expecting...

For you see I gone & won some tickets to a charity ride Nightrider London to raise money for your own chosen charity; it was over night, around London & 100km (62 miles). Definitely pushing my limits more than ever, I don't like London as a pedestrian let alone a cyclist, never cycled over night & going further than ever...

It was touch & go as if I would do it with train issues, weather & own personal stress relating to no job. But overcame that with a bit of help from friends & family & had the bike I built ready for action & I have named from the start as Roadrunner.

So on that day I did Nightrider London, I had actually cycled over 74 miles in a 24hr period. Sure was an emotional & physical moment for me, I'm actually achieving things now that I didn't even do before my leg went bad. Thinking about it does give me a lump in my throat as 2014 is proving to be a year I wasn't expecting it to be...

So I can safely say my leg & the rest of me are improving more & more & the leg is getting stronger as the months go by. ATM I am looking for work & looking for something that will allow me to push my boundaries a bit more than the last job. Of course I don't want to over do it & mess up years of physio, but I do see either the end of this year of sometime next year to be fully able bodied & clear the last hurdle of carrying heave loads across a room without the need of my stick...

My Bone Cyst Op’

As I've have said before, I've got a Bone Cyst in my Femur & needed an operation. Well 2 weeks ago I had the op & its been a slow long slog getting back to being myself.

Well they have cut out the Cyst, took bone off my Pelvic area as a bone graph but from the front, which surprised me as its a more tender area. With this bone sample, they mashed up & injected back into where they removed the Cyst. Then put a bracket into the ball joint & along the femur to hold the bone together.

The Op was done in the morning & I awoke 10 hrs later as they had trouble waking me! Should've told them I sleep like the dead as it is! lol

Staff were very friendly & food was pretty good, considering its a hospital, unfortunately the op was more envasive than expected & it was a week before I could get out. Didnt help that a couple days after I suffered chest pains (which was later diagnosed as stomach cramp) then internal bleeding where the bone gragh was taken (from blood thinners given for the chest pains as they thought I was having a clot in the heart or lungs at the time of the chest pains & docs being cautious!), had to be knocked out with Morphine after 2 hrs of excructiating pain!

Well now I'm home & have been for a week now. Staples were taken out today & i'm slowly getting the use of my leg. 1st week was like having a dead weight instead of a leg! lol Now I can just move it, bend knee 45 degrees & lift it an 1" off the ground. As you probably can guess I'm on crutches until my leg is all healed & fully functioning. Physio starts in 3 weeks once all is fully healed!

Now I like to thank my darling Jules for her support in all this, she's been looking after my dog during all this & is spoiling him rotten. Thanks for being there at the weekend after the op & visited me at every moment possible til she had to go back home. Also thanks for making my place nice & tidy for when I get home, big hugs are waiting for you!!! And thanks for being there to talk to, giving me praise & support!! It helped alot!

Also thanks to Tori for helping look after me the 1st weekend & my Mum for the rest of the week, she's been cooking a pile of meals for me & making sure I have everything handy & just have to reheat my meals from the freezer.

Also Jules is coming down & now doubt gonna bully me into letting her help me! lol

At least this time I can thank her personally when she's down!

Its been a hard few weeks, but with their help now & in the future I will make a full slow recovery. It will be a hard slog, but with all the support I'll get through it!

3 steps forward & 2 steps back! (Update)

Well if you dont know by now or read earlier blog, I have a problem with my left hip & have done for over 18 months. This is on top of a disability I have had with left leg for well over 15 yrs.
I went to see Specialist after he tried over a month before an injection to relieve the problem which wore off 2hrs later. Even tho' injection wore off, it was a success. Well at least to the specialist, as it has now shown roughly what is wrong. Specialist told me its 1 of 2 things! 1st it's a lump on the ball part of the hip socket or 2nd, a tight muscle attached to the socket so it's in tension & overstretching when moving. This is great to me as they now know what to look for, now the bad bit! They wanted to do a 3D scan of the ball socket, then send me to another specialist who an expert on both problems.

Well they had done a 3D scan of the ball socket & sent me to another specialist who is an expert. This Specialist was then to decide on how to go about fixing the prob. But once I got there to see this Specialist, it all changed!
The Specialist has reviewed my scan & wanted me to have an X-ray there & then, so I did. When I saw him again, he decided that the problem isn't my hip but a Bone Cyst. Now this was dismissed 2 yrs back coz it was small. But now been told its grown & still growing & is across more than 1/2 of the cross section of the bone. Thus the pain & left untouched the bone will snap!
So I went into Hospital few weeks later for an injection to kill it & shrink it. The injection didnt work, so now its the operation!
They are going to cut out the Cyst, take bone off my Pelvic area as a bone graph which they mash up & inject back into where they removed the Cyst. And because of this, theres not much to hold me up in this cross section (25%). So they have to pin the bone together to stop it just snapping!
Completely threw me at the time, not what I was expecting! But now I had time to think, I just need to get on with it & let them do whats needed! I cant leave it be for it will get worse & break. But I am kinda reluctant to the idea of the op & bone graph!
Now as you can understand I'm not to happy with this news, coz until its sorted my leg is not only in pain but can snap with any force against it (No Jumping!) lol.

UPDATE

Well Xmas is coming up & I now have a date for Op'.
Its in January & I'm in a slight flap preparing for not only for Xmas but the op too! Apprehensive atm too, biggest op i've had too!
But if you look at the pic in the Picture Album named Cyst, I've circled the cyst & you can see why it needs to be done!

3 steps forward & 2 steps back!

Well if you dont know by now, I have a problem with my left hip & have done for over 18 months. This is on top of a disability I have had with left leg for well over 15 yrs.
Today I went to see Specialist after he tried over a month ago, an injection to relieve the problem which wore off 2hrs later. Even tho' injection wore off, it was a success. Well at least to the specialist, as it has now shown roughly what is wrong. Specialist told me its 1 of 2 things! 1st it's a lump on the ball part of the hip socket or 2nd, a tight muscle attached to the socket so it's in tension & overstretching when moving. This is great to me as they now know what to look for, now the bad bit!
They want to do a 3D scan of the ball socket, then send me to another specialist who an expert on both problems. This Specialist will then decide on how to go about fixing the prob, but I been told that it be something like this.
"A single operation to repair ball joint by pulling it out of the socket, sand off the lump (laymans term) & push it back in! If they find its not the socket & it's the muscle, so they can loosen this muscle by cutting it & let it grow back together to make it longer."
Now as simple as it's sounds & great it's going to be sorted, its crossed my mind as I told my mum. IT'S GONNA HURT LIKE HELL AFTER!!! More than it is now!
And not only that, but on checking both procedures. Its gonna take months to heal & I will require someone to look after me & practically become housebound! Talk about screwing up my plans for the new year! lol
But I cant let that stop me! If I have to go thru this to sort my hip out, then so be it! Something else was mentioned during today's meeting, the operation could fix my existing problem with my leg, but it's only a slim possibility!!!
Now isn't that an incentive! For then I can get back to my life & go after my dreams!!!
Now! All I need is the pain in my ribcage fixed after 6 yrs & I be on cloud 9! lol


UPDATE

Well they have done a 3D scan of the ball socket & sent me to another specialist who is an expert. This Specialist was then to decide on how to go about fixing the prob. But once I got there to see this Specialist, it all changed!
The Specialist has reviewed my scan & wanted me to have an X-ray there & then, so I did. When I saw him again, he decided that the problem isn't my hip but a Bone Cyst. Now this was dismissed 2 yrs back coz it was small. But now been told its grown & still growing & is across about 1/3 of the cross section of the bone. Thus the pain & left untouched the bone will snap!
So now I'm off to go into Hospital in the next few weeks for an injection to kill it & shrink it. Should take 3 months to do the job, all goes well.
Now if it dont, well the next method aint so nice! They cut out the Cyst, take bone off my Pelvic area which they mash up & inject back into where they removed the Cyst. And because of this, theres not much to hold me up in this cross section (25%). So they have to pin the bone together to stop it just snapping!

Now as you can understand I'm not to happy with this news, coz until its sorted my leg is not only in pain but can snap with any force against it (No Jumping!) lol. And aint exactly looking forward to the idea of option 2 if injection fails to work. Read up on it & injection isnt a perfect way to sort it, but is best to try 1st as no operation required.

Thankfully when I came out of the Hospital, I had a good friend to support me emotionally as I was a bit of a wreck. Many Thanks to her for being there & helping me!!
Completely threw me at the time, not what I was expecting! But now I had time to think, I just need to get on with it & let them do whats needed! I cant leave it be for it will get worse & break. But I am kinda reluctant to the idea of the op & bone graph!

Also am sorta thinking how can this cyst 1/2 way down my upper leg, cause pain in my hip? Guess its a game of elimination & the cyst needs doing so we will see! Thats all for now, enough of my rambling!! lol